|FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
April 1, 2021
|Contact: Sharpening Supplies
8376 Murphy Dr.
Middleton, WI 53562
Local Artisanal Farm-To-Table Barrel-Aged Spring Fed Alkaline Honing Water
Introducing the New Local Artisanal Farm-To-Table Barrel-Aged Spring Fed Alkaline Honing Water
We are proud to launch our most innovative sharpening product yet, Local Artisanal Farm-To-Table Barrel-Aged Spring Fed Alkaline Honing Water. We spent the last year developing this breakthrough new technology and we are excited that it is finally ready for market. We know that plain old tap water works just fine for sharpening, but if you are someone who demands the very best sharpening experience, then our Local Artisanal Farm-To-Table Barrel-Aged Spring Fed Alkaline Honing Water is for you. Read on to learn more about the unbelievable difference.
How We Make Our Honing Water
Finest Spring Water
We source our honing water from the finest local spring in the Pheasant Branch Conservancy, located just miles from Sharpening Supplies HQ. This natural spring water provides the raw materials we use in our honing water. Sure, walking to the hidden spring takes a little extra time, and our vegan leather shoes may take an extra beating on the trail, but it is worth the extra effort when we know the quality of the water source.
Being local is critical to the quality of our honing water. When you source locally, you not only get the freshest water, but you also reduce your carbon footprint. Don’t worry if you’re not local to us, the same rules still apply. It isn’t local to you, but it is local to us, so you can still tell your friends it was sourced locally, but not your local, our local and we all know that local is local.
The Farm-To-Table Journey
The hills of southern Wisconsin are dotted with farms, this idyllic scene is where our honing water begins its journey. When water runs off a farm field, it flows into the ground. After filtered through soil and limestone, the water finds its way to the natural spring where it bubbles up to reach the surface again. When you sharpen using our honing water on your table, this completes the direct farm-to-table journey. So when we say our product is farm to table, you can be assured that it isn’t just marketing-speak.
Alkaline is Better
Our original formula of honing water was pH neutral. But as recent trends in the bottled water industry have shown, Alkaline water is clearly better. But being true artisans, we wanted to naturally increase the pH of our honing water while reusing an abundant resource available in Wisconsin. With one of our staff members being of Norwegian heritage, he came up with an idea for using the leftover lutefisk water to mix with our natural spring water. It only takes a 1% solution of lutefisk water to increase the pH to a perfect 8.0.
Barrel-Aged Like a Fine Whiskey
Before we can refine the honing water, we barrel age it. Much like a fine whiskey, fine honing water mellows with age. We use locally sourced premium charred white oak barrels for our water aging (none of that French oak here, Pepe le Pew). The char of the barrels acts like a charcoal filter. This filtering saves us a purification step in the laboratory. With the cold Wisconsin winters and warm Wisconsin summers, the barrels swell and contract with the seasons, ensuring the water penetrates deeply into the barrels. The barrel aging additionally provides a hint of vanilla aroma to the honing water and it also covers up some of the scent that was introduced with the lutefisk water.
Research and Honing Water Science
When researching ways to properly refine our spring water into true honing water, we consulted with the University of Wisconsin Chemistry Department. Unfortunately, they were unable to provide us with the true expertise required for this complicated task so we were forced to seek help from true scientific experts, the comments section. We needed to find real science experts, so after consulting the comments section of several social media websites, we were able to provide ourselves with the scientific confirmation bias we needed.
We can’t give away all the science behind our innovative honing water, but we can tell you that scientifically speaking dihydrogen monoxide is the primary component. Sure, dihydrogen monoxide can be dangerous, causing burns and creating environmental damage like erosion, but its ability to hone a fine edge makes up for these significant shortcomings.
Finest Particle Size
Our honing water can be used as a honing compound. Our fine honing water has a sharpening particle size of 0.000282 microns. This particle size makes any pastes, powders, sprays or compounds on the market seem like gravel. In fact the particle size is 3,500 times smaller than a 1 micron aluminum abrasive particle. And, as we all know, smaller particles = finer = better.
Using the Honing Water
Our honing water has a multitude of uses and was designed for those who demand the very best. You can soak your waterstones in it before use. You can splash it on your diamond stones to provide the ideal liquid to aid in floating off the swarf. But unlike many honing liquids, it also works as an effective coolant for the user if sharpening becomes too aggressive.
Ready to Ship
Our Local Artisanal Farm-To-Table Barrel-Aged Spring Fed Alkaline Honing Water is bottled in a handsome clear glass vessel that can proudly be displayed in any home or shop. Ready to ship to your door beginning April 1, 2021.
This April 1st joke was posted April 1, 2021. For serious sharpening products, please visit our main sharpening page.
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